Properly, hiya there, associates! Very long time no speak!
I don’t assume I’ve ever gone so lengthy with out writing in my 7 years of running a blog.
As common TT readers know, I’ve been by means of rather a lot during the last two years or so, each bodily and emotionally, and wanted to disconnect from every thing for a bit. I spent the final two weeks touring by means of my dwelling nation of Poland with my husband.
To be fairly trustworthy, I had weeks of content material able to be scheduled to be revealed, however there have been days after I couldn’t even convey myself to open up my laptop computer, and simply determined to take a break, additionally from the Internets. I felt this big must fully clear my head.
It was the primary time I’ve visited since dropping my Granny and I knew that the journey can be emotionally exhausting.
Over the past two weeks, I’ve cried greater than I’ve within the final two years. However not all tears have been tears of sorrow.
There have been tears of happiness.
There have been occasions I laughed so laborious my abdomen hurt- and I can’t bear in mind the final time I’ve felt that means.
There was quite a lot of worry, quite a lot of surprises, classes discovered, quite a lot of breathtaking moments, however largely I believe I’ve discovered quite a lot of peace. It’s virtually as if I lastly acquired to see simply how essential some issues are in our lives, and the way irrelevant and unimportant are others.
I don’t typically discuss what it’s prefer to have two locations you get to name “dwelling,” each being in two completely different components of the world. It’s laborious. One of many hardest issues is at all times saying goodbye. Saying goodbye to my grandparents was at all times most tough, and now that my Granny is gone, saying goodbye to my granddad was much more tough. I beloved having the ability to prepare dinner for him, assist him put his socks on, or give him a haircut.
We spent quite a lot of nights speaking about his life, our household historical past which I acquired to study much more about. Each time he talked about my Granny he’d name her “My Lovely Flower” and I’d smile by means of tears.
Having the ability to revisit all of the locations I bear in mind from my childhood is at all times a bittersweet expertise. The fields the place my cousin and I used to run round are actually occupied by a stupendous restaurant the place we now sat, her together with her husband and their little boy, my husband and I, having dinner, ingesting beer and laughing at each reminiscence that got here to thoughts.
I additionally acquired to witness my youngest cousin take his very first steps and was so glad I acquired to see him earlier than the “new child scent” wore off fully. His older brother, my godson, will flip 10 later this 12 months and every time I have a look at him, I’m wondering the place has the time gone? Their mother and I grew up collectively and though she’s my “aunt” we’re actually extra like sisters.
Mark and I did a ton of driving- we just about drove by means of half the nation, had quite a lot of nice talks, witnessed some wonderful views and met so many nice folks.
In a means, I really feel like I’ve been gone for months. I by no means go so lengthy with out working, and I used to be severely anxious that my canine wouldn’t acknowledge me as soon as we acquired again dwelling. Being disconnected from the digital world wasn’t as tough as I believed it’d be. I spent quite a lot of nights meditating exterior, and I discovered quite a lot of peace and clarity- each of which I craved so badly. I got here again full of latest power and concepts.
In order that’s what I’ve been as much as for the final couple of weeks- operating from the Internets and looking for peace. I’m again now and common posting will resume this week.
Love you. Imply it.
,
